I shared a post on Facebook earlier today. It said ‘You’ll save yourself a lot of heartache if you accept that some questions just don’t have answers”. As is often the case those kinds of memes get me thinking and this one was no different. Actually, I believe most questions do have answers but we just don’t like them, or can’t accept them or we believe in the wrong answer. This is especially the case when you have been in a relationship with someone with narcissistic tendencies. After the breakdown of a year long relationship I was desperate for answers. I am the type of person who needs answers to understand what happened, to move on and to make necessary changes. For months now I have believed a set of “answers” drawn from my own conclusions.
The Answer Was I Was at Fault – I blamed myself, until very recently. I drove him to cheat, to lie, to manipulate me. He had to lie to me because he feared my reaction, therefore it was my fault. I also just wasn’t good enough. I wasn’t worth honesty, truth and loyalty and especially love.
Of course, I haven’t been able to do any of the above things, move on, make changes because the ‘truth’ I believed in wasn’t the real answer but in my mind it was preferable to the alternative of believing he was a narcissist.
Writing it down now it strikes me again how sad it is that I would rather believe those things about myself than believe the person I loved, and still do sadly, was just nasty on the inside.
I know I am not alone. People that have been in those kind of relationships often blame themselves as they have been conditioned to do so. But, no more. I know the real answer now and I’ve accepted it and it sure as hell wasn’t me being at fault. I’m not saying I’m perfect in a relationship I am sure I have my faults, and I’m aware of many of them but I will no longer believe so little of myself and so much of someone else who doesn’t deserve it. I found my power in the real answer.
I have so much good stuffs to share right now I almost don’t know where to start! The dress! I’ll start with the dress! New from The Annex for the upcoming round of Enchantment and available in a range of gorgeously lush colours I just adore this figure hugging slip dress from them. It’s available in standard sizes plus a Maitreya, Belleza and Slink fitmesh options. There’s a couple of days until you can snag yours when the event opens on the 14th November so why not keep yourself busy with a trip to ON9 and pick up these beautiful eye tattoos/make ups from White Widow which come in 5 colours, with two options with and without shadows. If you haven’t been to 6th Republic yet you have just one more week to head over and see SL’s best decor and home creators pulling out all the stops. I’ve posed my pictures today inside the cinphul Apprentice Prefab. You really have to check this out yourself as this picture doesn’t do it justice at all. The building is an homage to the now condemned Prentice Women’s Hospital in Chicago.
Be strong ladies, and gentleman, and remember that once you accept the real answers you will feel the inner peace you deserve.
Credits
Body – Maitreya Lara
Skin – Lara Hurley Maitreya applier and Christy Catwa Head Applier
Eyes – IKON – Sovereign Eyes
Eye Tattoo – White Widow – Yume **NEW** at ON9
Hair – Lelutka – Sheena **FREE** at Mainstore
Dress – The Annex – Slip Dress **NEW** at Enchantment from 14th November
Headpiece – LODE – Crystal
Poses – Posesion
cinphul – Apprentice Prefab **NEW** at 6th Republic
{anc} – confetti **NEW** at 6th Republic
It’s so hard to recognize these things… good for you for no longer blaming yourself!
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Thank you Lucie. It’s a tough road but I’m definitely on the way back up ❤
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