One of the things I adore most about SL is that we can talk about subjects, and be more open about them, than we may want to be with people in our real life. Depression is one such subject. I have several friends that have shared their suffering on various forums, including facebook, which I know has helped me to discuss my own depression demons more openly too.
I have probably had depression of varying stages and severity most of my adult life, and probably through much of my childhood too, however, I didn’t realise that until a couple of years ago. Over that time I’ve developed coping mechanisms, as most people with depression do, for when the black fog hits home. They aren’t however miracle cures they don’t stop the feelings they just help me get through each day and go to bed hoping tomorrow will be better.
While for the first few years I was in SL I was using it as an escape from my feelings I have changed that perspective. SL is still an escape but I’ve learned to use what I can do in SL as a power to make changes to my attitude and my perception of myself rather than just to cover up and ignore my feelings and emotions. Ignoring the darkness when it descends is actually the worst thing I can do. For me, I have to embrace it, work with it and explore where those feelings take me. I also have learned that if someone or something is adding to those feelings then it’s not selfish for me to do what is right for me and to remove that trigger.
Last night I posted something on my facebook. It was a meme for how I felt at that exact moment. I was dj’g in a club full of friends, I was enjoying my set, I was chatting in local and voicing over during songs…and in between all that I was in tears. Uncontrollable sobbing that I couldn’t stop and could never explain why…other than I suffer with depression and right now is a black few days. But, the point I want to make here is I carried on. I got through my set, on a level I enjoyed the party, It was a small victory for me and every single day people with depression win battles, big and small, in our virtual world and in the real world too. Depression has enough stigma attached in life and we should be pleased and proud that we can discuss this illness through our virtual selves in an honest and frank way. If you struggle with depression and you are still here, still trying, and still coping I’m proud of you but more importantly, you should be proud of yourself too.
Credits:
Body – Maitreya Lara
Skin – Lara Hurley Maitreya applier and Christy Catwa Head Applier
Eyes – IKON – Spectral Eyes – Silverleaf
Hair – Mina – Edith – **NEW** Geeks n Nerds Event
Dress -Dead Dollz – Young Witch *Maitreya ONLY* **NEW** at Tres Chic
Shoes – REIGN – Thigh High Sneakers
Glasses – BOOM – Minimalist Glasses
Poses – Exposeur
Decoration – cinphul – Brooding Curtains **NEW** at Shiny Shabby