Writing a blog where you talk openly about your thoughts and feelings can be like walking a tightrope sometimes. I know there are people that might read a post that is about them or about a situation involving them. That said, this blog was started as a place for me to write about those elements of my life and as a way to process, sort and manage feelings and emotions. I have to take the ‘dance like no one is watching’ approach to writing this blog and specifically this post (I’m also fairly confident he doesn’t read this…anything over a 4 line paragraph is TL;DR usually).
It’s been a roller coaster ride of emotions this weekend and it struck me how quickly situations and people can change in Second Life…even those you think you know quite well. Some months ago I made a conscious decision to back away a little from a particular person. We were good friends, we had flirted a fair bit and spent lots of very long nights talking about relationships, feelings, emotions and where things might go between us. It was fairly obvious that we wanted different things and had a completely different perspective on SL in that respect. Over the weekend we talked more and with a different perspective and I allowed the hopes that I had in the past come back out of the box in my head that I had very neatly stuffed them away in. We talked about dates, we went dancing. All good right? It was, that is, until, during a conversation of quite an intimate nature, while snuggled up together he told me that I should try going to Teqi’s to meet someone ‘nice’. Now, I’m a member at Teqi’s and it’s a very fun place to go sometimes…but it’s the last place I’d look on the grid for someone ‘nice’ but secondly the comment itself stung. I don’t deal well with rejection (as I have spoken about before in the blog) and I know that this person is so emotionally dense and unaware sometimes that he probably has no idea how stunned I was for him to say that. I’m pretty sure he’s sat there thinking he’s giving me great advice and would have literally no idea why it might be a little bit upsetting.
The original conversation all started around the fact that while I’m quite comfortable on my own and don’t need to be coupled up I have, in the past, enjoyed being one half of a pair. All my friends have bf’s and partners in SL and I have…work and even though that’s the way I like it most of the time I realise that the things I miss about having someone who is different and special in my life do leave quite a gap. It’s really hard to put my finger on exactly what it is but I know I miss it.
Head – Catwa – Destiny
Skin – The Skinnery Maitreya applier and Maddie Head applier
Hands – Vista – Bento Prohands
Ears – Mandala – Steking Ears
Rings – Vista– Absolut Vendetta – Hydra Rings
Piercings – Swallow – Bollywood
Necklace – RealEvil – Xandra Necklace
*Dress – Canimal – Anubis
Shoes – Reign – Glitteratii Heels
Hair – Truth – Miriam **NEW** Mainstore release
Pose – Entangled Poses – Grace
*BIGBULLY Victorian Wireframe Lamp – Gold **NEW** at Draftsman
*BIGBULLY Victorian Wireframe Mirror – Gold **NEW** at Draftsman
*BIGBULLY Victorian Wireframe Chair – Gold **NEW** at Draftsman
*BIGBULLY Victorian Wireframe Side Table – Gold **NEW** at Draftsman
*BIGBULLY Victorian Wireframe Candles – Gold **NEW** at Draftsman